Looking at the Stranger

Staring past the lights and candles
Trying to listening to the conversation
I sat at the table with faces
Familiar and New

I tried to listen to the hollow laughter
The banter that never seemed to end
I tried to concentrate
On his beautiful dimples and blue eyes

Here was an opportunity
Here was a window
Here was a bloody beginning to some unknown journey
And I was least bothered

Madame butterfly started to sway the water
And I thought it was so ironic
Among the strangers I sat with
The person I didn’t recognise at all
Was me.

Looking at the mirror back at my big lonely apartment
I looked back at the eyes that seemed defeated
A smile trying hard but not quite getting there
And a soul that was tired

The charade, the views, the values
Life was meant to be this and that
People drudging along their dreary lives
Not knowing what they want

And here I was, not knowing who I was

Perhaps with time I will recognise
That defeat was but a milestone
To the person I would become
Someone who knew better
Someone who knew who she was…

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